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out of the cave

by cynthia nelson band

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1.
owls will come if you plant the fur owls will come if you plant the feather in the ground they make their nests on the edge of symbiotic pools owls will come and burrow and watch you owls will come and burrow, eyes of yellow there is a reason they cannot swim a partridge coat, a fairy ring, a redwood circle to sing a song on high, wind rushing by, back into woods' lullabyes a partridge coat, a fairy ring, a redwood circle to sing a walking nest is the crux of a family cross a road on the back of a family there is a drama of the female a partridge coat, a fairy ring, a redwood circle to sing a song on high, wind rushing by, back into woods' lullabyes a partridge coat, a fairy ring, a redwood circle to sing
2.
magic beach 04:52
things that don't happen happen in dreams and also in children's stories there can be kids and there can be kings eating the gifts that another wave brings fishing the green explaining the tide a shell to hear it all in, two ponies to ride spelling it out with a wandering toe letters are marks in the sand or the snow it is time for it to rise walk with time before it flies go on not knowing, the mystery's wise look out from in, in from outside watching the castles drown in swill watching molasses run uphill the death of the teacher some will say reveals a new creature, there is no someday
3.
hot skinny bird that i've become they'll come around when there's no sun high up in the clouds i am the only one since you and she have hung around i have been tied i have been bound to know no sleep to take no food and to be always in the mood i open up between the storms a sky inside outside the norms of what is possible and right unguarded wild blackberry night restricted breathing in and out and counting life excited hurting like a knife i understand 'cause it is twisted by your hand i like the thrills i dig the change i miss the peace i make no claims on what is fair or what is right 'cause i can't even know tonight i like the thrills i dig the change i know no peace i make no claims 'cause what is fair and what is right won't help me make it through tonight worn around my shoulders your love feels grand like a feather necklace we found buried in the sand your love and your love and my love are always hand in hand i'm watching gently through the glass as you are working on your band
4.
wind brings the dirt on out it puts it out it puts it out on vast erratic schedules on which nerves are overlaid bends back a scared willow brings a light unholy glow coughing its delivery giving everything it has this moment's come this moment's come to stay uneasy breathing the depths of its command all can't be decided before all the branches land height of its abilities top of its game fantastic topographic banging down the doors of traffic screaming out its name landscape landscape never be the same landscape forever changed sad confusing secrets when we talk about the wind one blew over when one blew in patience in the field of why singing nightly bye and bye a tangled punk stomach of nature glitter glass streetlight and stars you're tripping home from bars streetlight and stars whistle can't you speak you can whisper if you're weak sing a mighty martyr song one day the winds may all be gone whored unearthly creatures who cannot settle down it seems they've earned the kingdom's crown while winds have blown you down it seems they've earned the kingdom's crown wild winds have blown you down
5.
i will build this song again to honor your oblivion dreaming that you drink poison desperate to contain it follow you on your journey as you from mine do not depart blooming out from where we live to where composure comes apart crush infatuation with a neediness-elation of a star imposing gladness on us beauty unfamiliar gets forgotten between sessions of delivery from the daily singers songs and drunken power of pursuit we're tired then and never never tired again time to move this ship from shore enact a life of love unmoored on wide open fervent seas you still ask me your wife to be retreat from your sweetness to divine an understanding and more lambing of the small ones we provide for then design a perfect sentence to complete my naked presentation bathe myself in water out of which you sucked the poison reading books i got for all the freedom that you wanted from and for me now the sounds i make from cracking open aren't as pure and pretty as the place the place from which i sing drinking with your honesty and my jealous lunacy navigating blood and skin to honor your oblivion i wash all your pillows press my head against them when invited i wash all your blankets still the scent remains and i keep quiet dusting all the corners high above the bed and leaving sorrows hanging in the rafters where our joys can sense them laughing all their laughters coax you with my questions which are ill-advised and so i smartly try to hide and hide i do and hide i do
6.
i can take us out of the grave darkness it is often the unsuspected ones who breathe success provide impermanence as the constant upon which the all-else rests display the charms that calm alarms that sound and smack and knock us down and knock us back you've forgotten perhaps the fun of what is known as skin turning rotten as roses long-abandoned in the bin i'll brush against it and act it out courageous butterfly admit i think of you when the early morning pinking sky arrives then moves on by (so shy) follow me to where i am but haven't been before walk with me this endless walk i haven't walked before mellow me with a drink of wine or two or three or four follow me to where she is me and i am her and you are him and he is you and you take the time to release into a better mind and you conflicted too can open up into a certain side of you and start anew and embrace the cruel and rising tide and you can face the blue and meet a person who knows to abide if we all go we'll be together though we cannot see broken rainbows and fallen trees potential stinging bees biting memories like the songs we dearly love can't rise above the years it took to breed and blend and satisfy and scar and mend and rectify will you open to what you do not think is even there give a token of appreciating one who's come to care great and mellow i am waiting for you on the vacant stair waving hello half-expecting you to drop the ball and shut me down and never call (if at all) follow me to where i am but haven't been before die with me this awesome death i haven't died before mellow me with a hit of something that i do adore follow me to where she is me and i am her and you are him and he is you and you take the time to release into a better mind and you conflicted too can open up into a certain side of you and start anew and embrace the cruel and rising tide and you can face the blue and meet a person who knows to abide abide
7.
it's a kick-drum heart that wakes you with a start imagine sweet tangerines to soothe distorted dreams again the woods are on fire brave animals in the blur what was once called slumber becomes numbers that occur and you sing: "you are new to me explain yourself in words introduce the master plan you have for me and the birds tell me your intentions there'll be all these extra hours show me what to do with all this darkness as it flowers" it's a sick pattern bucking up against what you're trying to learn imagine sweet misery evaporating into the trees again the woods are on fire which way to run in the smoky blur what was once called slumber becomes digital bold red numbers it is new to you explain it without words elucidate the master plan you have for it and the birds tell it your intentions there are all these extra hours show it how you're turning all this grossness into flowers all these extra hours
8.
when i ask you for a little of your time if it's a hassle please don't hesitate to chime in that you're sorry but you have made other plans it is a question and it isn't a demand and when i ask you for the numbers of your phone 'cause i am hoping we can spend some time alone it is important to my emotionable state if you don't know yet well i guess that i can wait and you can say no and it won't thrill me no but it won't kill me no and i can ask again no we can still be friends when i ask you if you have some time to spare and then i ask you if you like it here or there if you will join me as i go off the ends of deep when it's appearing that you'd really rather sleep well you can say no and it won't thrill me no but it won't kill me no and i might ask again no we can just be friends can we drink until we're done can we talk until the sun 'cause there's a hard hit to the fun when suddenly you run and if i phrase the question better if i send the unsent letter could you be the one confessing ending all the second guessing you can say no and it won't thrill me no and it won't kill me no and i won't ask again no we don't have to be friends we don't have to be we can just be we don't have to be we can just be
9.
the cave 04:55
i was brave i was brave when i went into the cave it was dark it was cold there was nothing i could hold had a goal of a foal and a never-ending role and the path it did bend so i couldn't see the end and it took all my time slippery walls were hard to climb and it took all my time and each and every dime after years performing mischief it was time now to behave i was brave when i went into the cave i was brave extra brave when i stayed inside the cave and i held in my arms raw wet sleepy newborn charms then again when descended her tiny brother friend and they needed my attendance i needed their warms and i fed them my body and i ate their love and i never went beyond them not below and not above and my agency they ate my company they craved i was brave when i stayed inside the cave i was brave i was brave when i walked out of the cave it was bright it was night i ran smack into the light there were people who knew me before but most were new and i burned all the candles to their ending points of view as i sang what i sang and guitars resumed their clang there were truths of my youth reminding bells i rang in the hunger of the hunt did i seem to some depraved i was brave when i walked out of the cave
10.
we are a new band starting now (all is forgiven) we're going to do this thing though we don't know how (all is forgiven) i really like you when you come around i'm going to bite you when you next lay me down it's been a long trip i'll be returning (all is forgiven) please do not take from me that which i'm slowly learning (all is forgiven) please do not take from me the ecstatic electricity we are a new band in morning's generous hands all is forgiven all is forgiven all is forgiven all is forgiven too billet doux all is for forgiven all is forgiven all is forgiven all is forgiven all is forgiven...

about

this album is sequenced in the order the songs were written. burrowing owls and magic beach were written in 2010 and performed that year with the original cynthia nelson band of marisa anderson 2nd guitar, katy davidson drums, margaret douglas bass and daphna kohn harmony vocals and violin. hot skinny bird was written in the fall of 2014 and all is forgiven was written in the summer of 2015, with all the others in between, in order, one at a time. katherine paul and brent asbury were the second cynthia nelson band from january 2015-september 2015 when the recording happened at brent's beta petrol studio in portland oregon. all the instrument tracks were recorded live except for vocals, the one flute part, and bass on owls. cynthia recorded the vocals at home over the winter holidays 2015-2016. mixing mostly happened at marmoset music in may and june of 2017 with tim shrout. seth lorinczi was extremely valuable in terms of live tracking at beta petrol (assisting) and with some pre-mixing computer transfers. turn turn turn is where most shows were performed during this period and has been very kind to cnb as a venue.

thank you:
eileen myles "letters are marks"
maggie nelson "hot skinny bird"
laurie weeks "please do not take from me that which i am slowly learning"
aurelia nelson-reske "things that don't happen happen in dreams"
dusty reske for writing a melody that inspired the melody for "in the ground they make their nests on the edge of symbiotic pools"
crockett johnson for writing the book magic beach
lilith rockett for a pep talk
andrice arp for the artwork and design and general everything know-how
tim shrout for support around mixing and mastering
leo nelson-reske
katy davdison
jonas jenkins
elizabeth venable
geoff soule inspiring melody for the cave
chelsea rose
janie black
anna shelton
marisa anderson
paul haines
jennie barnwell lillvik
cameron jones 1st version 2nd incarnation cnb musical prowess
niilo smeds and ron burns for 3rd incarnation cnb
dead moon


eternal gratitude to brent and katherine for the parts they wrote, the performances they brought, and the deep time spent in basement rehearsal 2015

credits

released October 11, 2017

cynthia nelson: songwriting, vocals, guitar, rhodes piano, bass on owls, flute on hot skinny bird
brent asbury: drums, bass on honor, recording engineer
katherine paul: rhodes piano, bass, guitar, backing vocals

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Cynthia Nelson Portland, Oregon

cynthia nelson writes songs and sings them and plays them on instruments. in order of appearance: ruby falls, retsin, the naysayer, the sophie drinker music project, cynthia nelson, cynthia nelson band. new album available on october 11, 2017, "out of the cave." ... more

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